Team

The alarm clock says “Go!” and I’m running and rushing. And my big girl, my tween, still needs help with her every part of her day.

The “fight” is part of the routine. I clap loud and sing (annoyingly) “It’s Time to Rise and Shine… and give God the glory-glory.” Then we engage in a tug-of-war with her blanket, and she wins. Later I help her in the washroom, I help her clean and brush her teeth and get dressed. For us, it is work. And all of it involves some fight.

There will be countless moments this like in a day, month, year, even lifetime. This morning I remember it’s something that just we share, this taking care, this striving and fighting just to do the day.

We’ve shared it since the beginning.

I can still see her, newly born, spiky black hair and big grey eyes. I’d laid her in my hospital bed after everyone had gone home. Her father was away fighting in the war. “It’s you and me, girl. Just you and me.”

She’s eleven now and wants to do more, but her body doesn’t always work the way it should. So the glass shatters and the apple juice spills on the table, her plate of wild rice-ketchup-and mayo concoction goes flying across the room. On hands and knees I clean. She efficiently wipes ketchup on the one pair of acceptable pants and in her clean hair.

She leans on me with every step, we body-walk into the world.

Sometimes it seems she needs help with so many, many things.

Sometimes I feel helpless to help her.

But I trust that she is helped.

Tonight I plop down on the couch next to her. Quietly, unexpectedly she gets my glasses and pushes them, upside down, onto my face. My shirt is somehow hiked up over my belly – I mean, my six-pack abs – and I’m too tired to care. She reaches out and gently pulls down my shirt. She does it with the sense of order that she does most everything.

But her tenderness goes into my heart. Without a sound she communicates, I got you, Mommy.

Joy invigorates, and I laugh. That I would be so perfectly cared for by the one I care for.

It’s one of those rare, precious moments that a word is not just in her heart and head, but in her mouth, spontaneous and clear. I already know the answer.

“Rhema, do you love me?”

“Yeah.”

The Lord is my strength and my shield; in Him my heart trusts, and I am helped. ~Psalm 28:7

Advertisements

3 thoughts on “Team

  1. I’m smiling and warmed by your words. You write with such ease and clarity. You are doing it. You are giving Him glory and producing big fruit for the Kingdom. I’m so sorry it’s so hard. But you do it with such grace and faith. Keep going. Keep writing. This is your story that will change many people’s worlds one heart at a time.

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s